Sunday, 8 June 2014

Twinks' parenting tips.

Rachel's 'parenting teenagers the right way' tip #5832

Your teen asks you to pick them up from the cinema or a party.
Don't think this won't happen EVERY weekend. It will. And you'll go, because it's dark and dangerous and you're a bit of an arsehole.

You then tell them a time. Make it an exact time like 10.30. Not 'about 10' that won't work.

At 10.15pm you go upstairs, remove your bra, pop on your most washed up onesie (preferably one that's a bit worn at the crotch). You take your hair down. Mess it up a bit. Remove all make up and put a pair of comfy yet horrific slippers on.

You then drive to the cinema/ party and arrive at 10.29.

You give them 3 minutes. No more... Just 3... It's enough.

If no teenagers are visible at this point. You get out of the car and go in.
Just walk right in to the party and start asking for them by name.

You will only ever have to do this once.

You're welcome.

Rachel Keys, parenting expert as voted for by the whole of Twitter and my Mum 2014.