Thursday 26 January 2012

National Fucking Tyres.

Just a teeny rant today... Well not really a rant... A warning.. Quite long actually... Try not to nod off..

Yesterday I decided to check my tyres... Even to the untrained eye of a woman I could see they were illegal about 3 months ago... I quickly rang a few places... National tyres on Bull green coming up cheapest...

I kicked the crisp packets and school letters.. A colouring book , a dolls head.. Half a unicorn and a shoe under the seat.. Sprayed febreeze in wild abandon and slid down the road to town...

A kind man took my keys.. Told me it would be an hour and sent me off in to town...

1 hour and 15 pointless waiting around purchases later I returned...

Him..."Right madam... I've done your tyres ... But..."

Me.. *heart stops beating*..."but??"

Him..*sharp intake of breath through teeth*

me..."but whatt????"

Him... "well .. Your back brakes are binding, and are heavily corroded.. And well it's a big job love.."

At this point, he may aswel have said the entire sentance in Russian.. I give him a gormless vacant look and mumble "how much?"

Him.. "talking bout 380 love... And sooner rather than later really if your taking kids in the car" *waggles dirty finger under Ellies nose*

me.... *falls to floor... Lies still a minute...*..."three... Hundred... And eighty pounds???"

Him.. *fake sad face*..."yeah love... Soz"

Me.."right erm yeah erm.. I'll have to go sell a kidney.. I'll get back to you"

*flees garage clutching chest*

I arrived home and decided to ring the nice lad at Seaman and Davidson .. Who had done my MOT a few months ago.... He told me to take it to him today.

I arrived at 9am and he took my car, he said give us an hour , I'll have a look how bad it is ..

An hour later I returned.. Feeling a bit sick... Maybe with worry.. Or maybe because of the sausage and egg Mc muffin I'd accidently eaten whilst waiting ...

Me..."so???"

Him..*no sharp intake of breath*
"well .. It was sticking a bit.. So was a bit rusty .. I've taken it off cleaned it up.. Greased it, put it back on.. Loads of life left in it... Just give us a tenner love"

Me.. *pounces on man.. Licks his face...*


Sooo.. Be warned... Do not EVER use National Tyres.

I'm going back down there this aft to call him a wanker and punch him in the cock.

The end.

1 comment:

  1. Them fuckers cut the cable in my door handle so the drivers door wouldn't open and failed mot, I swear there was fuck all wrong with the car when it went in the robbing scouse bastards. So I fixed it with a cable tie and a shoe lace paced the mot and told them I'd be reporting them the pricks.

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